Posted in BLOG

Mommy’s Back!!! 

Hello there, as some of you knew, I’ve been away from my kids for a long period of time working abroad. When I came back home, from the day I arrived until this day that I am still figuring out what’s my next step as a working mom, for almost 2 months now I just stays home, I’m giving myself a little time to rest. 

5 years that I haven’t done my duty as their mommy, now that I’m back and my children are grown (16, 13, 9) we don’t need a household help, I do all the chores, waking up 5 o’clock in the morning to cook for breakfast and prepare their uniforms, once they all gone to school, I start cleaning our house. Prepare for lunch and pick up my youngest from school in the afternoon, have dinner by 7 evening, wash dishes and check their assignments, watch TV and go to bed after. That’s our daily routine.

This is also the right time for me to teach them how to cook (at least the simple one like cooking rice etc) – as I myself is not a professional cook and still having accidents on oil splatters while frying. Call me stupid but Yes I did this to myself, now I’m having scar from it. 

At the same time, I am also teaching them to do the dishes, sweep the floor and slowly washing their clothes, why slowly? Because they never do chores before the whole time I wasn’t here, their dad didn’t allow them, not to be lazy intentionally but maybe he was thinking it will be best if they only focus on their studies. Not for me, they need to learn at least small chores not to force them but to teach them “again” step by step which will make them more productive in future and be independent. I am also preparing them that when I start working here, they need to do some of these things by themselves. I am not a perfect mom, I yelled at times they don’t listen or do their things – I think that’s normal at least for me he he he

The important thing is, no matter how nagger I may seem, I can see the happiness in their eyes and actions that I am here with them. Letting do the simplest things may help them to be a responsible person too. To my kids, I love you all but y’all need to deal that MOMMY’S BACK! 🤣🤣🤣

Posted in POEM



Can’t you see how much you waste?
Spending money for a piece of cake
Then throw it if you don’t like the taste
Be considerate for goodness sake.

Children around the world are starving
No clean water and food in their intestines
Every day, thousands of ‘em are dying
It’s not too late, we can start giving.

Think before you throw that piece of crumb
Give some love and attention, let us now start
Look at the needy, don’t be so numb
A little of something will give smile to a child’s heart.


(picture taken from google images search)

via Daily Prompt: Crumb

Posted in BLOG

An OFW Mom

“OFW – Overseas Filipino Worker”
Overseas Filipino- (FilipinoPilipino sa Ibayong-dagat) is a person of Filipino origin who lives outside of the Philippines. This term applies to Filipinos who are abroad indefinitely as citizens or as permanent residents of a different country and to those Filipino citizens abroad for a limited, definite period, such as on a work contract or as students. – Source – Wikipedia


Hello there, Let me tell you a short story of my boring crazy life, both being an OFW and being a mother. I’m 36 years old, mother of 3 kiddos, my eldest son just turned 16, my two girls are 13 and 9.

At a very young age, I’ve been through a lot, and I mean — A LOT… Being in a broken family, became an instant parent to my siblings, misguided, rebellious, undergraduate, got pregnant, trusted easily, taken advantage by people, started a family life at a very young age, got hurt, failed relationships, need to work hard to support myself and my family, indebtedness, manipulated and so on… I am not saying that I am like an angel who had these sufferings (you don’t need to feel pity on me), some of it are because of me, I am human and I am bad on making decisions.  Although I’m tough as you think and enduring all of it, a part of me will whisper, “I am tired”,  I screwed my life early. But hey, that’s just a bit part of my insane journey.

To make the story short, I found myself one day leaving my kids on October 2012, dreaming of having a good job wherever I am destined to go, bringing hopes and wishes with me to be able to provide a better life for them, escaping something that I cannot take anymore, and their ages during my departure are 11, 8, and 4. But getting the things that you want is a predicament, do not think that fulfilling it all are as easy as you think. One wrong decision, you’re fucked and need to deal with it no matter how you wanted to escape.

Balancing your life being a mother and at the same time a worker in a strange land ain’t bed of roses. Homesickness attacks me any time of the day / night, wherever place I am. Many times that I shed tears during my sleepless nights, silently weeping, imagining my children’s warm breath and bodies besides me, their hugs and kisses. But I am here already, I need to be tough, I need to be numb. Outside, I looked like a damn bitch, well, strong and a happy person. People that I encounter used to tell me even with first meeting that, I am easy and light to be with, funny as hell and a kind lady, of course. Yeah right, they don’t know I’m bleeding inside. I even get myself into deep problems here and it’s only me who to blame due to me, myself and I, being an idiot to take decisions without thinking and trusting too much, but whenever it’s time to speak with my kids via SKYPE, all should be fine with a smile on my face.

Every time I will call them they will ask me when I will be coming back home, but the most consistent of ’em all and never fails, my youngest, sweet daughter, she will always asks me (whether  in the beginning, middle or last-minute conversation), with a sad emotion and voice.

 “Mommy, kelan ka ba uuwi ha?” (When you coming back home?) 

How many times I will wish she won’t remember asking me questions like that. It is like a knife stabbing on my chest – continuously. We have different reasons why we can’t be with our family no matter how much we wanted to, & how many times I felt that I am a worthless mother, especially if I skip calling them whenever I am having difficulties here, it adds more miseries in me, people might say “pera lang yan, hindi importante yan” (that’s just money, it is not important).. If this is your reasoning, then ask yourself again, because in reality, it is a necessity to give your family something that you cannot provide much if you are not earning. Again, I will say, we have our own reasons why we come up to a decision even if it is going to break your own heart and your children’s.

Being away from them, is difficult for a mother like me who happens to be with them all the time, bringing them wherever I am, sleeping besides them every night, it is a huge adjustment for me and especially for them. Incidents can happen that you can’t be there to defend your children if they are being bullied from school, or to discipline/scold them if they’ve done mistakes, you are just a phone call away and let your relatives do the works. Helping them with their complicated assignments via video calls is also a challenge you need to face, and what about the projects? The sibling fights, you will not be there as their referee, or to chase them with your stick if you need to.

The most heartbreaking things are, they are growing up without you, although you try to communicate regularly, the kids you left behind will be different. As they are on their adolescence period, all things changes, the things they want, the type of TV series or movies they watch, the food, their friends, their behaviors,  their clothing styles, courting and being courted, all of this stuffs, you will miss this stage of their lives, and we can never turn back time to experience that once again. Above all, all I wish and pray that will never change, is their love and respect for me, as their mother who loves them unconditionally. 

For all the parents who are working away from their home and kids, still, one of the best thing is – communication, never let them feel that you ain’t there both physically and emotionally. We, as adults still commit mistakes or decisions that the one being affected are our kids, we are still human and aren’t perfect at all, I am NOT, I’m far from being one. But let our love for our kids be perfect and pure.

And for all the kids who were left behind, all we just wanted? The love and respect, a little understanding from your side, and to at least see you guys are doing good at school and life, — we as your parents do not want you to experience what we’ve been through, or if it can’t be avoided, at least be as tough as we were —  it will be a great achievement for us, no matter how painful and hard, no matter what problem we are into, those little things are our happiness. So in time when all are in its rightful place, we will able to come back home and stay, we maybe, AN OFW MOM NO MORE. 

Posted in BLOG

Working Abroad – Bye Philippines, Hello U.A.E.!

Leaving your country for the first time can be very, very hard. Just like what had happened to me. I’ve been working in my country for more than 10 years, leaving your comfort zone would not be as easy as you think. Your family, your friends, neighbors, colleagues, the life you’ve used to, your routine and environment will change instantly.

Before my flight, I am too excited, and nervous as well, searching my destination country, the people, temperature, rules, crimes, etc… But as the day of my departure is approaching, the butterflies in my bellies are moving more and more, hahaha. And when that day finally came I can’t move my feet, leaving your family behind. I told them not to bring me to the airport because what I’ve heard from people leaving the country, it is much harder if the family are with you to say goodbye (our place is 5-6 hours travel by land to the airport). So literally, I was crying so hard, released my arms from my sleeping angel, my youngest child, so painful that I need to get my things, put it inside the car. Giving my two other children, my son and daughter a never ending “words of wisdom” explaining things and reminders (that I think I’ve told them millions of times already) There’s no turning back. I need to do this and be strong.

I arrived the airport and still nervous, you know why? I am one of those Filipinos that will try their luck to pass the immigration without any hassle. I am exiting the Philippines going to Hong Kong for 2 days (tour), then from there will go to the Middle East. The interview went well, Whew! They kept on asking me questions, again and again, trying to make me feel more nervous and maybe I might give them wrong details. But maybe, I am destined to leave the country that day. Then I arrived Hong Kong, alone… eating alone, talking to my family on skype that I am safe. Good that the next day is my flight going to U.A.E. or else I will be crazy. 🙂

As I stepped my feet here in the Middle East, Aha! at long last, I am here after the too much waiting, crying, traveling, butt-aching in the plane. My friend and High School mate named Richard picked me up. So this is Dubai. As we are in the Metro Train, he was telling and showing me places, the names etc. etc. but nothing was registering on my mind. I think I left my brain inside the plane. I am still worried, again why? I came on a tourist VISA, now it is up to my luck again to find a job.

Competition here is very strong, you are competing not only with your own “kabayan” but rather with different nationalities, Indians, Pakistanis, Russians, Chinese, Thailander, Indonesians, Arabs and so on. A resume is very important and how you defend what’s in there are far more than important. Be confident, pray and more LUCK as well.

Luckily, before my visa expires I got one. But the struggle doesn’t end there, you really need to adjust, the way of living, especially your home, here, it is normal to own just a “space”, home is the most expensive thing here. You want to be more comfortable, pay more.  For food, Filipino cuisine and ingredients, spices are everywhere. As you are abroad, you will work, encounter different people with different characteristics, attitudes, and you have to deal with it. Even the smell 😦 . For private companies, it is normal to have just 1 rest day, and usually, it’s Fridays, not like in my country that we have Saturdays and Sundays. For me it is OK now and already used to it, as you don’t realize the days are going so fast because homesickness doesn’t have any expiration, it will attack you anytime, communication with your family is the number one treatment. I am already working here for almost 6 years in the Middle East, but still, more to learn. For OFWs, the best way to survive is being strong and always remember the reason why we are here, our FAMILY. Life is not that easy as we know it, but it always depends on us how to deal and be happy in our own simple way. We have our own problems and we also got our own and different kinds of luck. Be responsible, follow the rules wherever country you were in, keep safe and be alert all the time too. & Don’t TRUST easily.

dubai camel burj al arab-xlarge

#iamanexpat #OFW #Dubai #workingabroad #expatriate #ofwmom #life #family #sapalaran #uae #pinoyofw

note: pictures from google images, story excerpt from my old blog