Posted in BLOG

Monsters in Your Head

(Heavy breathing can be heard, like trying to catch every air available in that dark room)

Help! Help! 

Screaming so loud but no one can hear your agony.

“(Panting!) It’s dark in here, don’t know where I am, nowhere to go…. I am tired, I am exhausted… “The Monsters” are here again, they will not stop. I’ll end this, they can not hurt me again.! They will consume every part of me. I can’t breathe. They’re going to kill me, or maybe I should do it by myself, I need to end my suffering, I need to end this life. They can’t follow me when I’m dead!”

This is not a horror story!!! This can be the monsters lurking in someone’s head. It can be mine, yours or a person you know.

Some may define it as – Depression, a situation we often take for granted but don’t realize how serious it can be to anyone who is suffering from it. It is like an evil that’s gonna consume our strength and sanity, we may not see the signs until it’s too late. It can be anyone, they can be your parents, siblings, your child, relatives, teachers, employers, friends, neighbors, celebrities you admire, or You… or me.

Depression is a mental condition where the one’s affected may have a traumatic experience such as – loss of love ones, bullying, work difficulties, personal problems, family matters, heartaches or financial situations. Some people can be so judgmental, can’t fully understand or just laugh at someone who claims to be experiencing it, until it’s too late that they’ll commit suicide or ruin their lives, some relies on substances, like drugs, alcohols and other forms of addictions. They turn into these as an escape from reality and thinking too much.

It is so alarming that even kids nowadays take their own lives or can  do acts that we never imagine from the innocent child that we thought. Their environment has a lot to do about it, it starts in the family circle, then their schools, friends and so on. Social media has a lot of factor with their behavior too. As a parent/guardian, we need to be aware what happens with our kids when they step out of the house. Communication, love and caring are still the best defenses.

Please… Listen, learn and try to understand.

When we know someone is being on this predicament, the ones affected should have someone to talk to, advises, and if possible – medical attention. It is a serious matter that we should not take for granted. Seek professional help. Act now, or you may lose someone dear to you…


Posted in BLOG

Just One Word: Launch!

Just one word
and some lives may end
Just one word
we’ll have again the worst event

Just one word from these powerful leaders – innocent lives will be at risk. I maybe not smart to say things like this, what do I know? Nothing, I am just an ordinary person who sees the scandalous news, I am nothing, my voice doesn’t mean anything! But, I will still say what I wanted to, for I am a mother who have young children who may suffer from whatever outcome it may have.

World leaders are in their positions because they were capable of, people voted them because they believed, some inherited the power from their family. People rely on them and their leadership hoping they can make the government better. And so they thought.

One bad decision and they can make it worst. Two of world’s powerful leaders are having  “WAR OF WORDS” that’s been circulating the news these days. Threatening, provoking and having blunt statements towards each other. Do they need to prove who is a better man than who?

Seriously, before threatening to begin a war and nuke each other’s countries and allies. Be sensible enough that there are innocent people who will suffer, die and be affected. Sending your military to kill human against human while you both are safe wherever you will be just giving commands? Not fair.  If you both wanna prove something, who is better, take a match via MMA and broadcast it to media so everybody’s attention will be yours both.


via Daily Prompt: Launch

Photo Credit: Google Search

Video: Fox News

Posted in BLOG

Lord, One at a Time Please?

I don’t know if you can call me a good or a bad person, or simply an idiot who doesn’t learn. If I trust, I trust too much, if I love, I love too much, and if someone I trust betrays me, it will hurt me too much and leave me devastated, whether in relationship nor friendship. No matter how many times, but I still give all my heart. I’ve done wrong to people, a couple of times, I am human, I made mistakes which I regretted. I’ve done good things as well, as much as I can, I help and give without expecting anything in return. But when things turn around, I found myself alone.

Am I that dumb to think that the world will be fair with me because I tried to be? Am I that bad, for me to suffer all things that’s happening to me right now? How many times I prayed “Lord, I ain’t a bad person, why these things are coming to me, all at once?” – I got no respond. Then I even questioned, is there any God at all? I started praying hard when I was a child, because since I was “that” innocent child I experienced hurt and pain and heartaches and depressions and…. I don’t know what else… From that moment until now, why it never seems to end? Am I praying less? Is it not enough? Or I didn’t pass for being a “good human”?

The darkness of this room where I am is also filling my soul with evil thinking to end it all. I cried hard, so hard that I never had for so long, I tried to suppress for a while and don’t want to see weakness in me, but on my alone time and sorrow, I did. The depressions and pain are lingering in me. Even got up from my bed to look for medicines inside my cabinet. Yes, I am on the edge of that. I was…

And I heard laughs and voices from my inner soul and mind. My kids, they are still waiting for their mommy come back home, It is not the time yet…Not now, not like this. Why I am so careless and selfish to even have the taught of that?  I need to endure the consequences that I put myself into, all by myself. But never to give up. I still hope that one day, everything will be fine and I will be happy and in peace. For now, the fight for this life isn’t over yet.

If there’s really someone watching over me, I never asked for a lighter load, I know, I believe,  I’m a survivor. I just have a humble request, “Lord, one at a time, please?”